He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
