he wants to bone in the snuggie
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
