Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
