I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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