1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
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