Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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