so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
