erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
