Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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