I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
