If that was your dad, he is hot
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
