I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
