You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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