flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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