just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
high people should be assigned attendants
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
