omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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