I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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