So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
