ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
