Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
