How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
