i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
