That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
