all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
