I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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