First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
