His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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