he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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