do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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