Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
