So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
