that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
