if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
