I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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