its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
You've changed since you got that strap on
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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