Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Success! We fucked roommates!
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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