I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
