hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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