I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
