i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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