My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
