Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Randomize
