no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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