dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
