No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
