He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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