So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Where is the hickey?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Randomize
