Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
