It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
