I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
