im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
be right there i have to get my cape
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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