Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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